Aging Gracefully?



Lately I have been struggling a bit. It's not really a "new" issue for me...but one that I have felt more irritated by and more vocal about since I have had 4 daughters.

I was always pretty athletic- when I was in school, I was never "overweight" but I was also never happy with the way my body looked. There was always something that I looked at and thought to myself..."This could look better." Most of the time it was my stomach...sometimes my legs, maybe my broken nose, at other times...freckles, oh and how 'bout that red hair?? However, I always liked my eyes! I sort of bought into the images society and mass media put before me about what beauty was and how ladies should look.

As I grew older, I had children. 4 in 5 years! My body became everyone else's for quite some time and I was honestly too tired and too busy to even really realize what it looked like. Before I knew it, I had not been pregnant for about 9 years and I had become 30 pounds or so overweight. (Truly overweight by medical standards). I was having knee pain and foot pain and realized I had not been tkaing care of myself in all the blissful busyness I was enjoying with my family and friends. I looked in the mirror and I saw fat and flab and thought to myself, "Wow...I thought these areas of my body were bad when I was in Highscool- what was I smoking??" The truth was, I was really in pretty good shape back then...muscular, and active...a far cry from where I was at that point and time.

I began working out again and realized what a big part of my life that had always been and how much I really missed it...and as playing with my kids, going up and down stairs and playing basketball got easier again...I realized how IMPORTANT it was! My knee and foot pain lessoned and I was toning and tightening and losing weight and inches.

As my face got thinner, I began to notice something new...WRINKLES!! "What? Where did those appear from so suddenly??" So, now, this is where I sit...I don't want to be vain. I don't want to buy into what society says looks good. I want to raise my girls up in such a way that this sort of thing isn't an issue for them. But, really?? How did my eyes get to looking so OLD???

Aging gracefully is probably just as much about how gracefully we accept the things we cannot change and make the most of what we still have as it is anything...This is a new area for me...the one thing on my body that I was always happy with is changing...I have teen agers...I am almost 40. "Should I gain weight again so my face is more full and then the wrinkles will be more smooth? No...my health is most important." Haaaaahhhh.....continual change causing me to continually grow...that's one thing I know will never change. :)