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I was sitting in church after a pretty moving morning in Rush Hour yesterday. We broke into "family groups" and my family group consisted me and my husband, our own children, and children from 2 other families. I just LOVE kids of all ages, so I was really feeling blessed to have a chance to talk with the kids, teens and tweens about how they are gifted and talented. Rush Hour also has singing, dancing and really cool skits that make you laugh as you learn..(it really has become one of the highlights of my week, since we started going a few weeks ago!) I came into "Big Church" feeling good!

The pastor came out on stage with a mega phone, and some big sign hanging around his neck that said something about "YOU ARE GOING TO BURN IN HELL!" He was shouting out words of condemnation we have all heard before...things about drinking, lust, dressing immodestly...I knew he was trying to make a point...I knew this wasn't his style...I have seen this style though, before.

He took off that "costume" and he ended up saying something that immediately brought tears to my eyes... "The reason people don't believe God loves them is because Chirstians don't love them." In fact, that makes tears come to my eyes every time I think about it!! 

THAT is TRUTH- cut right to the heart!! Jesus himself came for the poor, prisoners, blind, oppressed, lost...he had COMPASSION....he showed LOVE. He came to PROCLAIM FAVOR. To save the world...not to condemn!

I don't know why sometimes as Christians, we act like we are perfect? Christians are certainly no more perfect than anyone else in the world! The main thing is that a Christian knows they are NOT perfect and therefor, they know they need a saviour...I know that I mess up EVERY day! I am SOOO not perfect! SOOO IMPERFECT!Why wouldn't I, a Christian, want to extend and share that same mercy and grace shown to me-to the people around me on a daily basis?

It breaks my heart to here the words "The reason people don't believe God loves them is because Christians don't love them." Because, I have felt that way. I have felt that condemnation from Christians that made me feel unworthy, unloveable, unaccepted. I have had people in my family and some friends go through that as well. It really does push people away from Christianity....from Christians....from God.

I cannot speak for any other Christian. But I pray that no one I come in contact with would ever feel that from me. I pray that the people that surround me would feel LOVE. That they would KNOW I am just as human as they are and struggle just as they do...

"Since when are Christians better than anyone else?" he said. The truth is...we aren't. We just know we need the Grace and Mercy and Love that comes from God through Jesus.

Hmmmmm....just can't get it out of my head..."The reason people don't believe God loves them is because Christians don't love them."......

Take Time to Celebrate!

Last night I was able to watch The Ohio State Buckeyes play Marshall over dinner with my husband and some of his work colleagues.

It was a great game for Ohio State, and as I watched the game, I was reminded of something.

Each time a touchdown was scored, there was a little bit of time spent celebrating!

Seeing the little dances, the chest bumps, the finger pointing out to the crowd as the player came into the end zone- all little acts of celebration- that seemed to make me smile even more than the actual touchdown!

I thought to myself, "THAT'S IT! We have to take time to celebrate!"

Too often, I think we stay so focussed and so set on our "to do"  or "honey do" list that we forget how important it is to take even just a few mintues to celebrate the job well done, the process of our lives, the monuments both big and small that occur throughout the "game" of our lives.

A tooth came out, a new thing learned, a task completed, an anniversary, a birthday, a wedding, a birth, a problem solved, a step in the right direction taken, a new song learned, a new relationship, a broken relationship mended....

How about just celebrating the process? Each touchdown was a step closer to the end result of a won game. Each day we live is a step closer to the end result of our lives. Along the way, there is soooo much to dance, sing, and shout about! I don't think we should wait til the very end to reflect on that! I think we should try to reflect on the steps along the way- and take joy in them daily!

TAKE TIME TO CELEBRATE!

Bloom Where You're Planted

Where you are planted....                                    

Well, right now we are planted in Colorado. All of us. Mark, me, Valentina, Shyanna, Tanise, Nikayta and Cadence.

We have had some emotional  happenings as of late because of this fact.

Valentina arrived from Brazil on August 7th. Almost 3 weeks ago. She is a doll. We love her to pieces! It was her choice to come to the USA as an exchange student.

Sometimes choosing to be planted someplace doesn't make adjusting to the new soil any easier. She was shedding a lot of tears the first week of her stay. She was talking to and skyping with her friends and family a lot, too. She was very homesick.

Enter Shyanna. She had done so well in Romeoville her first year in public school. She had made many friends- some very dear, in fact. She also exploded on their basketball team. I guess you could say she found her niche and was loving her life. So much so, that she said she did not even want to move back to our home state of Ohio!

Transplated, not by choice, she has also been homesick. Not for her family as much (since we are here with her), but for her friends, her basketball teams, her familiar and comfy environment, the things she was looking forward to there.

We had to make some tough decisions with our girls. We had to limit time Val spent with family and friends in Brazil on the computer and phone. We may have to limit possible trips back to Illinois for Shyanna. We sometimes have to limit contact with the past so we can concentrate on the here and now. So we can grow roots and begin to bloom where we are.

A seed that keeps trying to come up out of the ground where it is planted cannot grow roots and flourish. And so it is with us. We cannot deny the place we are planted to become our home and begin to establish friends, hobbies and a life. If we are to deny these things, we are to deny all the beautiful possibilities that are before us for growing and blooming and becoming who we are supposed to be there.

Though we miss people and we have memories and plans that have not yet been fulfilled in places we have been, we cannot dwell there....where we HAVE BEEN. For by not digging into the soil that is currently around and soaking up all that it offers, a seed will never grow and a blossom can never bloom.

We must learn to BLOOM WHERE WE ARE PLANTED.

Green Pastures and Still Waters

All of my life, I have bee an achiever. Some might say an over-achiever. (lol) At times, it seems that the word "rest" could not possibly have been a word in my vocabulary! I have always enjoyed making lists and checking things off. The bigger the project, the better! People around me would just assume let me work alone as I rarely know how to even take a break! My philosphy has been that of "get the work done and then we can eat or play." 

Lately, though, all the busyness that I am accustomed to has been stripped away. There are no complications...fewer responsibilities...and beautiful green pastures, sunrises and sunsets, wildlife, and mountains everywhere I look! In fact, I have had a fox walk before my path and even a snake slither before my feet while walking around a reservoir and enjoying a gorgeous sunset this past week.

I feel rested. I used to get "heart palpitations" on occasion from nerves being jumpy- probably from being "maxed out" from all the many activities I was involved in and the many responsibilities that I held. Now, I look around me and notice a steady rhythm in my breathing and heart beating. I do not feel the stress that I once was so used to feeling and it seems to be making a difference in my ability to truly enjoy the many blessings in my life.

I can actually hear animals around me...crickets, locusts, and birds. People I care about talk to me and I am completely focussed on what they are saying and can enjoy hearing and seeing them as they share their lives with me! My husband and I have been able to spend good quality time together every day and share our lives, thoughts and feelings. I no longer have to go for a run to clear my head and think. I have a clear head...I am not distracted.

Worshipping God has never been easier! I see Him in everything surrounding me! His creation is magnificent and I am constantly marveled by it and by his many provisions for my family.

"He maketh me to lie down in green pastures. He leadeth me beside still waters."... verses I always thought talked about death. Now, I am realizing for the first time in my life that this is the key to LIFE! God doesn't want any of us so busy or so stressed that we are unable to enjoy the many blessings He has put before us! He leads us and makes us so that we can enjoy Him and all of His creation. The people, the places, the animals and the scenery! GOD IS SO GOOD!

All About Me

WOW! Today I am hit pretty hard.
Today I heard this still small voice that said- "Callico, why is everything about you?"

On my way home from taking the teens school shopping and doing our grocery shopping we managed to get into a traffic jam. A traffic jam out in the country, not during rush hour and about half an hour from home.

I sat there and enjoyed listening and watching the girls dance and sing to a couple songs on the radio...and then I began to get impatient!

I had two daughters waiting for us at home. I had a supervisor coming over to take pictures of our home for the exchange student program. I had to get home to clean up some things before that happened. I had frozen veggies in the back of the van that were thawing. I had to PEE!

Did you hear me?? I HAD! I. I. I. I. I. I. I. ......

UGH! Then it happened, we came across the hold up. There were skid marks all across the road from what looked like the other side of the median and when you followed them to where they ended, you saw a car- a car that had completely flipped and there were things lying on the ground around it. It made me want to PUKE that I had been so concerned about ME!

Started thinking, then. That still small voice was RIGHT ON! (Unfortunately) For the past year, I am realizing how self-centered and self-seeking I have been. I HAVE made it all about me. Virtually everything! I used to be selfless and so other-motivated. What happened???

I went from being a stay-at-home mom who wrapped her world around her husband and children, to this lady who seemed to never have enough. Not given enough credit, clothes, purses, time to herself, or jewelry for that matter. I went from being so involved at church- singing, praying with people, leading small group and doing Children's Ministry- to not being involved at all. Who had I been serving for the past year? Who had I been concerned about?? Me. That's who!

I got the message today. I am not feeling good about it at all. But, I guess it is better to hear it and be able to work at getting back to the basics of caring more about others....less about me, than to have not heard it.

I realize I will need a balance. It is never good to go to the complete extreme on either level, I am realizing. I will need to take care of myself so I can care for others. But, right now, I guess I am still digesting this rough message....

Second Chances

This is my second attempt at writing this blog and how fitting to be writing about second chances! This just keeps in what appears to be the theme of my week- first week in our new home in Colorado!

It all started last week when a pregnant lady was going door-to-door in our neighborhood selling magazines to put herself through Nursing College. She asked if we believed in second chances. Immediately I said, "Yes!" She gave me a high five and asked me why, to which I replied, "Because I have been given second chances." She shared that she felt she was being given a second chance through this selling opportunity as she was from the Inner City and had a baby on the way and was preparing for a better life for the two of them. I appreciated her story.

This past Sunday, my daughter shared with me that her pastor in Sunday school let each child in her class take one shot at a basket. That was all they got- one chance. After, the pastor asked if they would rather have had the opportunity for more than one shot- or chance and he proceeded with a lesson on second chances.

Later that day, our exchange student shared with us that she had been hit by a bus while walking. Then, last night we were jogging together outside and I heard her wheezing. She shared that she had asthma and when she was nine it was a big problem and took her to the hospital with cardiovascular trouble. (Talk about second chances!)

Then, today as I was preparing lunch, I heard one of my other daughters talking with her siblings about second chances....I thought, WOW! Could I hear that one more time?? WHAT is going on?

I have had a pretty lazy day with lots of time to think. (I am a thinker anyway- you will rarely- if ever catch me with nothing on my mind.) I thought about this apparent "theme" and why it is that it keeps coming up. I also thought about the many second chances I have been familiar with during my life.

I thought about me walking into a room where a heavy bookcase was and seeing my little brother climbing up on it just as it began tipping forward. I ran in and was able to hold it up until my mom could come in and help.

I thought about a friend of mine choking while we were on a trip to Washington DC and how I performed the Heimlich without being trained how and the food came dislodged and flew out of her mouth and she stopped choking.

I thought about the many times I had taken my life into my own hands as a young adult thinking I was invinceable and doing very stupid things! How it was a miracle at the very least I had made it through some of those situations.

I thought about a couple of friends who tried to commit suicide that I was able to be there for and get help - and thankfully they survived!

I remembered a time I was driving my Ford Escort to BGSU during a snow storm with some friends and how my car was spinning out of control as a semi approached from the other direction on a two lane highway. I fought and fought to straighten it out, but nothing worked until I completely let go of the wheel and sent up a little prayer. Suddenly, we were driving straight and out of harm's way.

I reflected on a couple relationships I have had with people that would be completely dead right now if it weren't for second chances.

Soon I was thinking about the present. About how in some ways it already seems as though we have been given a second chance with this move. A chance to bring our family closer to our values again. A chance to strengthen our relationships with eachother, a chance to see some economic growth, a chance to be more involved at church. Could it be that somehow we will be used here to help give another person a second chance at something? The possibilities are endless!

Who knows....but I know that the possibilities are there. They are ever present. You never know how many chances you will get in this life and you never know how you may be involved in another person's second chance....

Do I believe in Second Chances??? YES!!!! And, I am VERY THANKFUL for them!

Dumpster Diving

A lot of changes are going on in my life right now. We have just relocated from Chicago, Illinois to Denver, Colorado. I have been living in a hotel with 4 girls, and two dogs for the past 4 days. We will be joined by my husband - and finally move into our new home - which by the way, I never even saw until we arrived here yesterday. I relied on my guy to find us the perfect place! (Yes, he did a fantastic job! I knew he would!)

I gave up coaching basketball. Something I have been passionate about for the past 9 or so years. I started coaching when my oldest was in Kindergarten and she is now going into 9th grade. I had recently established a couple of Zumba fitness classes at our local recreation center- and had to leave that, as well as a very fun neighborhood Zumba Fitness class and a lot of great neighbors!

Now- combine all of this with the fact that I was leaving some people I hold very dear to my heart- people I love. Add to that the fact that so were my family members and as you might know- a mother feels the pain her children feel...and I swear I felt every emotion they have had about this move right along with them.

We are also moving further from the family and friends we love in Ohio- which means less visits with them...this is yet another thing pulling at our heart strings!

On top of all of this- I have been a single parent of four girls and two dogs for 3 months. (My husband went on ahead of us to start his new job). Trying to keep all the regular things that go along with "normal life"as well as preparing for this move was definitely a challenge at times!

I am not complaining. I knew from the time we moved to our home in Illinois from our home in Canton, Ohio that we would be moving again. In fact, we thought we may only be in Chicago for a short 1 year to 18 months. With the economy taking a downward turn, we stayed for 3 yearsas Mark's company was not moving people into new positions for a while. I am simply saying all of this to say.....

At times, I have been a basket case. Crying. And crying. And crying. At times I have been a complete GRUMP. At times, I have been reclusive and wanted nothing from no one. My emotions have been all over the place and sometimes very ugly. I certainly haven't felt quite like my normal self. I have not had the patience and cheer and joy and love that I seem to normally have quite easily.

It was when I threw my keys into a dumpster along with our trash somewhere in Nebraska and on our way to Colorado that something occurred to me. The dumpster stank! The keys went right to the bottom...I could see them- but there was no way to reach them without diving in after them. It wasn't pretty!

That is when my 3rd daughter smiled and said, "Sure, I will get them..."and with a smile on her face, she went in, grabbed them and came out! I have thought about that over and over the past couple days.

It reminded me of other loved ones in my life- and how they dive right in with me - sometimes without me- when things are going bad and they stink and they smile and say "Sure!" It is through these times in life when things can get ugly- when IIIII can get ugly and IIII stink - that I most see and feel the love of those who choose to ignore the stench and be there with me and for me!

It reminds me and inspires me to be that kind of person- to have that kind of selfless love for those in my life who need that smile and willingness to dive into the stink of the dumpster!