Day 3

Monday, June 10th.

We get up early again.... it is strange, but this is far from home and we are far from having all the comforts of home.... but it is feeling familiar and to me, pretty normal already to be here, in Belize. I am not used to not being able to flush my toilet paper, cock roaches, ants crawling all over the hotel bathroom, the extreme humidity and lack of ice in my drinks.... (actually, not having ice cold drinks throughout the day is pretty hard for me to get used to- even the drinks you get right out of the refrigerated section are not that cold here.) But, I am feeling pretty comfortable, for some reason.
 

I am pretty adaptable. We moved a ton while I was young. About 10 times from the time I was 3-11. I am not sure if that is why- but I seem to adapt pretty easily to change. In this case, though, I am wondering if it is because although I am in Belize, I am surrounded by US citizens. We have 16 in our group. There are 9 from the Mississippi group and then we have 2 from Praying Pelican from the US- actually, from Minnesota.
I feel, looking back, like I got to know these people better than many of the people I met from Belize. These, after all, are the people I spent most of my time with.

Anyway. Wake up at 6am. Wake the rest of my room at 6:30. Meet in the lobby at 7:45. Head to the church for breakfast. After breakfast we being cleaning and painting the church!

This was the day that I personally felt a huge blessing from God in a one on one situation through something service (which also happens to be one of my strongest love languages.) We have loud music playing. Washing walls and preparing to paint them a bright white. I look into the baptistery and asked Melvin, "Do you guys still use this?" He says yes. The area walking up to it is a little closed in area- similar to a closet with stairs. I pull everything out, knock down spider webs, sweep, scrub the walls, the steps.... it was very dirty. Spiders came down to greet me and I didn't freak out. "Proud moment". Usually, I scream and run! I get into the actual baptistery and clean the same way.....Melvin comes over and asks me if I had water dumped on me- "No. That would be my sweat!" Gross. Then I move to painting trim in the sanctuary.
 
 

As I kneel on the floor and paint I sing along with the music and I think about people wanting to come into this church - feeling like they can come and feel God's love, be in a clean and vibrant area to do so. (At least that is my prayer.) Feel good and welcome and clean and fresh here in this place. And it hit me- God's presence was overwhelming. I remember reading a book years ago and a guy names Brother Lawrence was talking about how he worshiped God even while washing dishes.... and I now knew that feeling! I was completely worshiping God as I painted this trim and the feeling overwhelmed me and I began to cry.... it was a wonderful feeling. One I hope I can carry with me into the future. How wonderful it is to worship God- to show Him love in my love language of serving!

Lunch time! We take a break from painting and we prepare for our first night of Vacation Bible School. We are hopeful that walking around and inviting the kids yesterday brings them here today!
About 40-50 kids came that first night, I think. A team of kids performed a skit for them about "God Makes us Special"- they developed and performed it themselves. Another group of  us lead them in dancing to some praise songs- I love dancing with kids for God! It is super fun and I love encouraging them to express their love and joy before him- as adults people become so inhibited! (I wish we would dance and be joyful more-side note!) We had a team teach a memory verse with motions and then it was games and craft time! So proud of these teens and what they accomplished!

 

 

 

 

As this time with the local kids ended- they had new bags they decorated and they were going around asking all of us to sign them. It was amazing to me how much they appreciated us being there. What a blessing to be a blessing.

Dinner:



Dinner, and some down time with a meeting before we headed back to the hotel for our team Bible Study/ Meeting. Many of our students didn't want to have another meeting. Adults get burnt out on meetings. It was late, we were tired, but our lead youth pastor felt strongly about having these meetings consistently. So, we met. It was good to reflect on the day and talk about how to make tomorrow better. For me it continued to help be focused on God's plan for while we were there, instead of my own. I get in the way a lot. Being a planner, I was actually enjoying not planning my meals, cooking, or really knowing until the night before what the next day held in store for us. I was praying tonight that the students would be able to let go and just trust that whatever was planned for them was part of God's bigger plan. :)

Day 2

Sunday, June 9th! 

Wake up time for this camper is 6am! Getting the rest of the room up at 6:30. My room-mates are Tanise and Shyanna (my daughters), Allie and Kayla (another leader).

Last night wasn't the best night's sleep of my life- but not the worst either. Plus, I am super excited about this day and all that it holds!

BREAKFAST:

                                          

First thing is first, we have Sunday School. I am looking forward to this! Our little group is teaching in the teen room. Last night I was able to help Mia put together her lesson. I have full confidence in this young lady! She is so bubbly and compassionate. She is determined to let God use her to reach out to others. Beautiful!

She is talking about the Church being one body and every part of that body being important and useful in ministry! 

                                       

We had a great time at Church- and then at the end of service, we played some games in the back yard with the students from St. Richards and all of the kids at the church who wanted to. Red Rover Red Rover.....I remember being completely impressed by the manners of the children from Belize. They each said, "Please send ______  right over." It was so cute!

After church, we had lunch - a real Belizean experience! Plantains with coconut rice and beans! (we would have this everyday for lunch with a different meat and vegetable.) I added hot sauce to mine- some of the hottest hot sauces I have ever had. YUM!

We played a game (introduced to us by one of the team leaders from Praying Pelican Missions, Andy. It was called Silent Football..... I think. Anyway. This is a hilarious game which really allowed everyone to get to know people's names and had people getting up and sitting down doing hilarious activities! I must admit I didn't play until the 3rd day. But I watched and laughed until my cheeks hurt! 

We also did a training time with Denny- the head leader from Praying Pelican. We learned about talking with people and used an illustration of a house, people standing on the roof, reaching into a glove, which was holding an airplane, with a tennis racket for a propeller, a light bulb in the racket netting, a PFC officer standing on top of the plane with a goal on top of his head and between the goal posts were praying hands instead of a football. This illustration was to remind us of conversations we could strike up with toal strangers in an effort to get to know them. Where do you live? Tell me about your family. What do you do for a living? Have you traveled or lived anywhere else? What do you do for fun? What kinds of ideas do you have about life- your passions? Is there anything you fear? What goals do you have for yourself? Your family? Your community? Can I pray for or with you?

ANDY and DENNY:

Then we went out to the community and we talked to people- and they ACTUALLY ANSWERED THEIR DOORS! AND TOOK TIME TO TALK! :) (So un-American.) 

I had been looking at the scenery of Belize since we arrived. Trying to take as much as I could in. Trying to learn about the people and their culture through what I saw. I continued to do this as we walked about San Ignacio. This place is more in the mountains of Belize. There are typically two kinds of homes- wooden ones built on stilts and cement ones built on the ground. The people hand their clothes out to dry.... I am imagining many of them hand wash them as well. The stores, for the most part are cement buildings with garage door type entrances- they have refrigerated sections but the heat here is unreal and so nothing seems that cold. Not as cold as the refrigerated section back home. People are friendly- but women and children seem a bit more shy. Men are very forward. They do not seem to mind blurting out comments like "Hey baby..." Hi Mami".... etc and they smile and sort of stare from what I have been noticing. We are always in groups of at least 3- and always try to have at least one male with us anywhere we go.(On a side note, I think it's important to mention that I notice signs in the city of Belize the day before. Many billboard that said things about AIDS and HIV. I saw one sign that actually said something like "I Have to Have Sex to Have a Home. Help." My heart was just about ripped out of my chest.) 

After a time, we head back to the church and from there decide to go down to the river where we hear a lot of people are gathered on this hot afternoon to cool off! A dog that had followed us around earlier in the day was at the river and believe it or not, this same dog would make a few more appearances at various locations we visited. There are LOTS of stray dogs in Belize. One of the PPM team members told me there were like 7 dogs to every 1 person! That's a LOT of dogs!

We went to the church again for dinner and visiting with each other and then prepared for Church Service. 

This church service is pretty neat as our Rocky Mountain Group put the service on. (St. Richards went to a mass at the Catholic church down the road.) Conner a young man who just graduated high school led worship. Ben- our Youth Pastor gave the message. A few of our teens gave their testimonies. One of them was my daughter, Tanise. She told them about her cousin dying and how that caused her to live in fear and have anxiety for a while- she shared how she got through it with God's help. I was very proud of her! I believe when you tell your story- it brings freedom to you and to others. You don't have to hide or feel ashamed. We all struggle with the same kinds of things and after hearing your story, another person can experience the freedom that comes from knowing they are not alone and that they, too, can share. 

I personally, also enjoyed worshiping in Spanish. Even though I knew not all that I was singing, it was fun and freeing to sing to God in another language!

I'm pretty sure that we went back to our hotel then and did our team Bible study time that Ben had for us. We were all so tired....but it was good to reflect and prepare to be improve in the next day.

At this point in my trip, I was a bit emotional from just being tired and I was feeling a bit awkward. I was one of three leaders and was feeling like I was not really leading. I have a different style of leading than a lot of people. I learned this style of leadership at Vineyard Church in Columbus, Ohio. It is called being a "Servant Leader" and it falls more in line with my gifts and my love language of serving. Since, I was busy being with the students and doing what they were doing and I didn't really know the other two leaders from my church, I just felt kind of out of the loop. I was the oldest person on the trip- but not really hanging out with the people closer to my age much. (Story of my life! lol). We have 2 campuses and as it turned out, I was the only adult from my campus going- it all happened kind of last minute as well, so there wasn't much time to get to know each other before our trip!) I used my Bible study time to remind myself that this trip was not about my feelings or me. It was about whatever it was God wanted..... this was a good thing. I am thankful that Ben brought it along! My moments of feeling awkward didn't last long. Through this Bible Study time, I was reminded that whatever was happening was a part of God's plan. His plan is always the best plan! So, I smiled and really began to savor the time I had with the students and the work I was able to do. It truly was such a blessing to just trust that what was going on was exactly what God wanted!!

Day One

The day is Saturday, June 8, 2013. The time is 2am. 

Wow! I can't believe I am getting in the shower! I had taken a bath around 10pm the night before but that was more for relaxation - this one was to scrub my head and body and feel truly clean since I was unsure that I would feel that way again for the next week!

All showered and meeting in the church parking lot at 2:45am. Bags all packed, lists checked. Our youth pastor Curtis is there to pray with us. I wish he was joining us on the trip. Lots of changes had happened and I barely know one of the leaders going, Ben (he is the youth pastor at our other campus- and a new staff member I just met the week before is going, Kayla. But, I have known some of these students over 2 years now and two of them are my two oldest daughters.... it's not like I don't know anyone..... I hate not knowing anyone.... 

Two mothers of two of the girls from my church campus come up to me, look me in the eye and say to me, "Please take care of my baby." Of course I will. I am the oldest adult on the trip and I am a mom- and honestly, I love these kids! No pressure.... just the way life works... mom's naturally take care of babies.... and so I tell them , "I will," as I give them a hug.

Emotions are overtaking me- So much of how I thought this trip would be had already changed as several people had dropped out that originally were going to be a part of it. I had a friend who was supporting us with prayer- he told me that he was praying nothing would go according to plan and I was quite sure that his prayers were being answered even before we left. This was beginning a lesson for me in trusting God- I am a planner- but this trip wasn't about me, it was about Him and His plans are perfect.

Wonder- I wonder what God has in store for us.

Excitement- I am excited to find out.

Fear- A little fear is healthy- not knowing what to expect and doing your best to prepare.... My daughters and I took a class on self defense before leaving. I had heard that sex-trafficking was high in Belize and I wanted us all to go in with confidence that we might handle a situation better if it were to arise.

Homesick- Although we were just now leaving, I already missed my two younger daughters and my husband. It would be difficult not talking with them for a whole week- they are a huge part of my life!

Anticipation- I was already thinking about the relationships that would grow and develop from this trip and that was super exciting because I love people!

We boarded our plane and left at 6am. I got patted down and they swiped something over the palms of my hands in Denver- that was interesting.....other than that it was uneventful. I couldn't really sleep, although I was tired. My mind was wandering and I was taking everything I could in. 

                           

We arrived in Belize at about 11..... or was it twelve....? I am not sure, but it was time to eat! :) The lunch they fed us was FABULOUS! Food is important to me- so this was an excellent sign!

                                                                                   

We waited with the staff from Praying Pelican at a park by the beach not far from the airport for another group that would be joining us. (That wasn't part of the plan, either.) I am not sure what happened- but about a week before the trip, we were told that another group would be working with us. They were from Jackson, Mississippi and they were from St. Richard's Catholic Church- which to me meant very little, but I guess it was a bigger deal to others and I would understand that later....A group of young kids hung out with us at that beach and we shared music and some dancing. We were already mingling with the natives- our students were so welcoming and so ready- it was so good to see!

  

I felt bad that by the time that the other team had arrived, we were all so tired from our long day. We were not the most welcoming or talkative bunch- but I would apologize to them for that tomorrow, when I could see straight again. :) We drove in our charter bus for about two hours from Belize city to our location in the Mountains in San Ignacio. Dinner was served, we had a meeting and we were driven to our hotel- the Mallorca- while the Catholic group stayed at the Baptist church we would be working at for the week. 

Looking forward to some sleep!

    

Sleep I had- soundly- until the choking got to me! My daughter, Tanise was in the bed next to me and woke me up with a startle as I heard her choking profusely. I jumped from bed and lead her to the door. Heimlich Maneuver performed- seemed to help some.... pounded her back.... she is coughing- but not choking.... I was petrified in the midst of this. I noticed one police station somewhere on our way in- but who do I call for emergencies? Where is a phone? I sent my oldest daughter to get our leader, Ben, but by the time he understood what was happening, it was ll over ...... thankfully. I fell back asleep with my arm extended out and my hand over her in the other bed. I wasn't feeling comfortable as I still had no idea why she was choking and I was nervous about it happening again. I said a prayer and then I checked on her many times through the night. 

Lesson learned- be more aware of my surroundings.... phone locations.... emergency help. I could have called 911 and there was a phone in the hotel lobby. Now, I knew. 

Beauty for Ashes

Sunday, June 2, 2013

Beauty for Ashes

I can't remember when I started wanting to go on a Mission Trip. I do know that I always pictured going to Africa. We met some great friends while living in Oklahoma and the thought of going with them and their family of three young daughters to Mexico stirred something in my heart, but my husband said no, our daughters were all four 5 and under and he said there was too much risk.... I just know that as long as I can remember I have wanted to go. I have always been compelled to - and have often told myself that my mission field was right where I was- wherever I was. There is always and everywhere a need to spread God's love by being His hands and feet - serving and loving others. So, throughout my life, I have stayed close to home and have done what I can.

This past year, the pastor of the youth group I serve in announced to us that our youth group would put together a team to go on a Mission Trip to Belize. We would most likely work with an orphanage, do VBS and sports and visit elderly shut ins and love and build relationships with these people. There was already a tugging at my heart. I have wanted to adopt since I was in 4th grade and I have no grandparents left in this world- which can at times leave a big void for me as I spent a lot of time with both of my grandmothers. I adore the elderly.

Then he said we would go June 8th. WHAM! That just about sealed the deal in my heart. My niece, only 12 days younger than my oldest daughter, was hit by a car and killed on June 8th at the age of 9. Somehow, hearing that date and realizing we had the opportunity to love on these kids who needed love on a date that had been a very sad date in our lives, could now be a date when we took the sadness, the pain and loss we felt and feel and bring hope and love to others.... to other kids.... I am not sure how to put it into words.... but I had a lump in my throat immediately and I thought, "If even one of my girls wants to go do this, we will go. I will know without a shadow of a doubt that this is God's plan for us." I asked my two oldest daughters after service what they thought and they BOTH said they wanted to go. (Another lump in my throat!)

I had no idea how we would raise the money. $1850 per person x 3. That ain't cheap!! But, I knew we were supposed to go and I knew I needed more faith!

Interestingly, one of us was provided for rather quickly.... and so that left 2 person's funds to raise. 

Another surprise. I opened a place for teens to hang out and an Artist came and showed the students (and me) a little bit about working with Charcoal pencils. I found a focus and calming when I drew with them and a freedom. I began to draw and people began to tell me I should sell them. (Mind you, I haven't had an art class since 8th grade!) But, I sold them- lots of them! We raised a good deal of money through these drawings. We had several people just want to support us financially as they thought what we were doing was a good thing and they wanted to help us get there! Also, my husband and I were put on staff coaching the girls' basketball team at the high school and some of the money we were paid from that went into our funding. We also had a "Zumbathon" and raised some money dancing! We worked some fundraisers at restaurants and concessions for Upward Basketball.....We obviously prayed and had lots of people praying for us- and it happened! That BIG sum of money all came together little bits at a time and we are now spending the next several days preparing for the trip that we might have ignored of looked at as impossible to attain...... GOD IS GOOD!

The reality is my mind is this. My niece, Kaylynn, is not my first experience with pain and loss and she wasn't my last. I was close to her age when I lost my best friend due to a drunk driver and my most recent painful losses have been my grandmothers and my sweet Uncle Ralph. But, when we go through things like that, we can choose to stay in the pain, suffering and loss- or we can use those feelings to fuel us toward a life filled with an appreciation for life, love and people and we can make it our goal to live, love and serve to the fullest of our abilities. We can become bitter and hardened or we can become compassionate and soft for others. 

I prefer Beauty for the Ashes.... 

Excitement Stirring

Excitement Stirring

Woke up at 5:30 again this morning..... (that sun coming in the window does it to me every time.) I used to get mad about waking up early - I prefer to stay up very late and sleep in- or at lease I used to.
But.... life is constantly changing and so am I.
I woke up today and looked at my phone which has the t-minus app. on it counting down the days, hours, minutes and seconds until we take off for Belize.



It said 6 days! I can't sleep! Today we have our final meeting! Today we are only 6 days away from this life-changing week we will have in another country with people we do not know, yet. HOW EXCITING!!!!!
A friend of mine has been praying for us on this trip. He is a pastor now- was a year ahead of me in school- got me to go to church and actually baptized me my junior year, telling me he wanted to hold me under a little longer and make sure it "took". lol
Anyway, he has been praying one thing in particular and that is that nothing will go according to our plans. But, that God will be in charge- because he says that is when everything is the best! It's already been happening with this trip. Many changes have taken place since the day we signed up- there are some people no longer going and some people now going who were not. I am sure this is part of God's plan. And, since I have NO IDEA what to expect as we visit a third world country and stay with orphans and shut ins in poverty stricken areas, I have no real expectations or plans except to LOVE the people I come into contact with and the team I serve with. Interestingly enough, when I came down this morning, this is the Bible verse that was on my computer!



1 Corinthians 13:1-3
I may speak in different languages, whether human or even of angels. But if I don’t have love, I am only a noisy bell or a ringing cymbal. 2 I may have the gift of prophecy, I may understand all secrets and know everything there is to know, and I may have faith so great that I can move mountains. But even with all this, if I don’t have love, I am nothing. 3 I may give away everything I have to help others, and I may even give my body as an offering to be burned. But I gain nothing by doing all this if I don’t have love.

The Waiting

Wednesday, May 29, 2013

The Waiting.....

Waiting..... it's something I am getting a bit better about as I get a bit older.

Life is full of waiting.

Waiting to meet the Mr. Right.
Waiting to get out of school.
Waiting for summer to finally arrive- and if you live in Ohio- the sunshine along with it.
Waiting for the first baby to be born.
Waiting to see if you are having a boy or girl.
Waiting in line for the bathroom.
Waiting to see your family again when you live 1000 miles away.
Waiting to hear from someone you love.
Waiting on the bank to tell you if you can purchase the home.
Waiting to hear back from an interview.


I haven't been the most patient person in the world.
I have never really liked waiting.

Lately, though, I have been waiting for a trip that I have been waiting on my entire life. I get to go to another country on a "Mission Trip." I am 41- will be turning 42 just a couple of days before we leave.

Why have I been wanting to do this?

One reason, I believe mostly that us Americans are pretty spoiled. We have so much of everything. I want to go spoil some others. 

Another reason is that I believe in God. But, I don't like hitting people over the head with the Bible- or preaching with words. I believe we are here to LOVE others and that sums up the message Jesus tried to spread while He was here. I want to go LOVE on others..... smile at them, hug them, sing and dance with them, play games with them, tell them my own story and why I believe in God.....and listen to REALLY listen to them and their stories. I want to serve them- is there something I can do while there to make their lives better/ easier? I hope so!

I am blessed to be a youth group leader at my church for high school students! I am super excited to go on this trip with some of the students from the group- which includes my two oldest daughters!

For now, we wait..... The plane leaves at 6am on June 8th.
While I wait, I make good use of the time by praying. Asking God to prepare our hearts. To protect us. To use us for good. To teach us and grow us through this.