SO BLESSED!

As I reflect on the year 2010, I am completely in awe.

I am so blessed! SO BLESSED!

A beautiful home with room for guests, a job that I love, health, more than enough food and clothing.

LOVE! I am simply surrounded by it!!!

I am sooooo extremely blessed by the love I have from wonderful friends...both far and near...both old and new. It is such a comfort to me! To think there are people I could comfortably go and spend real time with in many states as well as other countries! Many of these friends I count as my family. They are incredible!!

I have a beautiful extended family! Parents,sisters, brothers, in-laws, aunts, uncles, cousins. So many of them and such special relationships with them! Each has made a positive impact on my life.

My church! I feel like I am a part of two. One in Ohio and one in Colorado. Such a blessing to be a part of bodies of people who truly love God and people and show that love by their words AND actions!

I have the most tremendous, wonderful daughters in the entire universe! No, they are not perfect- because none of us are- but boy, have they changed my life for the better and do they EVER make me feel LOVED and PROUD!

I have a fabulous husband, who really does everything he can to provide for all of our needs and wants and then some! He teases and he tickles and he really cares for us. He is good with babies and loves kids. Not just our kids, but all kids! Logical and level-headed...he balances me. He is very loyal and a leader in all he does. It blessed my heart as I see his generosity and servant-heart outside of our home as well. It blesses me to have witnessed the growth I have seen and done with him over our last 18 years together.

I am just so blessed! Tears were coming as I wrote this out...my heart is so full. So very, very full!

Yes, there were some unpleasantries in 2010, of course. But those unpleasantries just help me to appreciate the pleasantries all the more!

2010 was such a gift and I cannot wait to watch as each day in 2011 unfolds!

Resolving to be Content

Yes, yes....this is my second time blogging in one day, I know. I told you. I have been thinking a lot, lately.

About 5-6 years ago, I was asked to speak on a topic at a Women's Retreat in Ohio based on a Max Lucado book called "Traveling Light". My talk was on being Content. It was the beginning of my realization that I have such a struggle in that area.

I am not really sure why people have the personalities they do. I know that some of it is supposed to be natural and some is formed by circumstances in your environment. I have taken personality tests, gift tests, and the Strengths test. They basically have all confirmed what I already knew about myself. I love people, but I need time alone. I am very responsible and task oriented and always see room for improvement. I don't like to waste time. I enjoy doing and being busy and moving forward.

Well, I have this inner drive. It pushes me. Motivates me. Can make me seem competitive. This innner drive can drive those around me crazy! It can make me tired... it can make you tired if you read my posts on facebook.

I seem to have this need to do more, be more, see more... I guess the common theme is more. And, for the coming year I am resolving to do less, be less, see less.... I feel in part, that all this endless searching and reaching and striving that I do can distract from the absolutely wonderful and fulfilling life that I actually already have.

I have a loving husband, four wonderful daughters, pets, a lovely home, great friends and extended family, a fabulous church, a job that I truly enjoy, the opportunity to serve in family ministry at my church, and enough responsibility that goes along with all of that-- why would I feel I needed more????

I am going to stop what I like to call "dissing my content" and start fully appreciating and fully giving myself to those things that are most important to me. I am going to be content! This is my Resolution. :) Please, don't let me get distracted!! :)

Love is in the House

Just packed up all the Christmas decorations...except the lights...something about the pretty, colorful lights at this dark time of the year brings me warm fuzzy feelings, so I just cannot put them in a box quite yet.

The house is clean- smelling like "vinegar chips" as one of our neighbor girls told me as I mopped with vinegar water! I told her that was what I was going for. I want any holiday guests coming in to think of our home as the one that smells of vinegar chips! (insert laugh) She said, "Really?" (Yes, she is a teen- and she is a blond!) "Ha! No, " I told her, I just use it because it cleans really well and it is natural." 

Anyway, so I have some time to write and it is good because my brain has been overflowing with thoughts lately. Writing helps me sort, think, express, and make sense of it all.

When I was young, I hoped that when I had a family I would be "The Koolaid Mom". You know, the one whose house all the kids' friends would come to and hang out? Yeah, that was how I wanted my house to be. We have become that house. My four daughters have friends coming in and out all the time. Several of their friends say we are their second family, they call me mom, and honestly, sometimes I feel like they are part mine! ;) I love it! I wouldn't have it any other way!

In the past few years, we have had 3 foreign exchange students during separate six- month segments of time. Two girls from Brazil and one from Italy. I grew to love each of these girls as they became a part of our family while they were here...each bringing with them a new opportunity for growth and learning to our family as well as us helping them to grown and learn in different ways while they were here- indepedent of their birth families.

Tomorrow, Shyanna's best friend from illinois, Sierra, arrives. We are soooo excited to have her spend the week with us! Then, we will turn around and say good-bye to our exchange student, Val, Tuesday morning. Wednesday, we have a FEAR FACTOR birthday party for Shyanna, and I believe we will have around 10 more girls sleeping over. Then Thursday sometime, we are expecting our new frimly (friend + family), the DeBords. They will be moving in which will be an adventure that we are very much looking forward to! That will bring us to a total of 4 adults, 8 girls, 4 dogs, and 1 cat in our lovely home. :) New meaning to the words, "Neu Crew Zoo" that some of our friends have coined us with over the years, won't it?! Hehehe

But, all of this, as crazy as it sounds...as busy as it is...makes me soooo grateful!! I am grateful people feel comfortable being here. I am grateful that people feel the love that we have for them. Today, at church, a Bible verse was shared. 1 John 4:7-12 "Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us."

I have heard and read these verses previously, but suddenly I am feeling what they say in a whole new light. I always say that love makes the world go 'round- but I feel like I am really just learning more and more what it really looks like to be loving- it is so much more about action and so much about focussing more on others and less on self. To me, it IS what REALLY matters. Loving God and loving others....nothing matters more!!

Toby Mac is one of my favorite all time Music Artsists and this is probably one of my favorite songs of his..."Love is in the house and the house is packed. So much so, I left the back door cracked. Mama always said it's a matter of fact- when love is on the house, the house is packed." You can listen to it here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UGJjbQckGb4

I truly hope that our home is always packed and full of love! I am so very thankful to be filled with love for others and I know that the love I have is only there because I feel so fully God's love, mercy, and grace in my own life.

Marriage...a Dream within a Dream

I love that movie! And THAT is one of my favorite lines of all time.  The reality of it all, though, is that marriage is hard work!
I realized that to some point before I got married. I was afraid of marriage. Out of all the people I knew who were married, most were also divorced.
A little more than a year ago, I had been married for around 14.5 years. I had known my husband for 17 years. During that time, we had our fair share of ups and downs. Fortunately, we always said, we had never been down at the same time. Suddenly, all of that changed. We were both down at the same time. Neither of us were sure how this whole thing would pan out.
The truth of the matter is that I went back to my hometown and I talked to some of my family and let them know where I was in it all. The way I saw it, we had a few options...we could stay married and unhappy until our youngest was 18. We could make the decision to quit and move on. We could work it out- but it was going to be WORK, if that was what we chose.
I will never forget something about that time. I thought,again and again, about my own life. I had been a child of divorce. I thought about my kids. I thought about the work that would undboubtedly come from a divorce- all the possible unpleasantries....but more than that....I thought about what my baby brother said to me.
"Cal, when was the last time you put on a killer dress and got all dolled- up for your husband? You know, it may seem bad, but us guys like the lady on our arm to look hot." Then he said, "And, you can't quit. You are an example to the rest of us. We look up to you."
Truth in love. That was tough to here. I HAD RESPONSIBILITY. I needed to realize my part in my marriage and in the lives of people around me.
I went home. My husband and I talked....we decided to WORK at our marriage. I had left feeling like I knew what HE needed to do to help. Since then, I have repeatedly seen things I need to do to make our marriage better.
I think that is what I want to share...as once again, I am seeing that marriage is like life. Constantly changing. New needs and desires arise. We really need to be like a student of our spouse and learn what those things are constantly, and then work to meet them. The joy lies there. Meeting a need- filling a gap- completing the other in some way.
It is the Holiday season....so while we are thinking about talking about GIVING...what about concentrating on GIVING ourselves to our spouse. Put a bow on yourself!! :)

                                                                         

When the Rubber Meets the Road

All of us on on a road to somewhere...a journey if you will. Each of us has a path we choose to follow.

Sometimes, on this journey called "my life", I have gone down paths of beauty and found much joy. Sometimes, I have gone down very dark and scary paths and had to find my way to a new place. Other times, the path has seemed uneventful and fairly boring. While on the road, I have journeyed with some people, crossed paths with some, and have just walked by others.

The older I get, the more I realize how each person, as they travel down their own personal road, is valuable, is learning, growing, and experiencing what is necessary for them to become the person they were meant to be in the end. Along the road the people that we come in contact with can make a huge difference in the final outcome of our own journeys, if we let them. And, we have the capability of making a huge difference in the lives of those we come in contact with, if they let us.

I talk of loving people. I talk of wanting to help others. If this is true, then when things get ugly, when people make poor choices, when they lie or hurt me in some way as they struggle down their path- I have a choice to make. Am I going to stay and show them love - maybe tough love- but love, none-the-less, or am I going to walk away from them and turn my back on an opportunity to potentially help them head down a path that is more full of life and joy and good opportunity. After all, some bad choices down a dark road does not mean that a person is a bad person. It means they may have simply made some bad choices...and haven't we all??

I hope I am going to back my words and my thoughts about loving people with action. When the rubber meets the road, I am hoping to grab the wheel and drive- with a purpose!

Aging Gracefully?



Lately I have been struggling a bit. It's not really a "new" issue for me...but one that I have felt more irritated by and more vocal about since I have had 4 daughters.

I was always pretty athletic- when I was in school, I was never "overweight" but I was also never happy with the way my body looked. There was always something that I looked at and thought to myself..."This could look better." Most of the time it was my stomach...sometimes my legs, maybe my broken nose, at other times...freckles, oh and how 'bout that red hair?? However, I always liked my eyes! I sort of bought into the images society and mass media put before me about what beauty was and how ladies should look.

As I grew older, I had children. 4 in 5 years! My body became everyone else's for quite some time and I was honestly too tired and too busy to even really realize what it looked like. Before I knew it, I had not been pregnant for about 9 years and I had become 30 pounds or so overweight. (Truly overweight by medical standards). I was having knee pain and foot pain and realized I had not been tkaing care of myself in all the blissful busyness I was enjoying with my family and friends. I looked in the mirror and I saw fat and flab and thought to myself, "Wow...I thought these areas of my body were bad when I was in Highscool- what was I smoking??" The truth was, I was really in pretty good shape back then...muscular, and active...a far cry from where I was at that point and time.

I began working out again and realized what a big part of my life that had always been and how much I really missed it...and as playing with my kids, going up and down stairs and playing basketball got easier again...I realized how IMPORTANT it was! My knee and foot pain lessoned and I was toning and tightening and losing weight and inches.

As my face got thinner, I began to notice something new...WRINKLES!! "What? Where did those appear from so suddenly??" So, now, this is where I sit...I don't want to be vain. I don't want to buy into what society says looks good. I want to raise my girls up in such a way that this sort of thing isn't an issue for them. But, really?? How did my eyes get to looking so OLD???

Aging gracefully is probably just as much about how gracefully we accept the things we cannot change and make the most of what we still have as it is anything...This is a new area for me...the one thing on my body that I was always happy with is changing...I have teen agers...I am almost 40. "Should I gain weight again so my face is more full and then the wrinkles will be more smooth? No...my health is most important." Haaaaahhhh.....continual change causing me to continually grow...that's one thing I know will never change. :)

What if...

[What if God wants us to be honest and true more than He wants us to obey "the rules?"]

This is a question posted by one of my Facebook friends this morning.

Without even thinking, I found myself blurting out, "HE DOES!"

I love it when I get a confirmation about something I have recently heard or seen. For me, I usually know it is something I need to pay attention to because it is something that is brought to my attention more than once...more than twice... ;) (so maybe what I am saying is that sometimes it takes me a little time to catch on!)

I think about the stories I have read in the Bible. In each one I can think of, Jesus was into hanging out with and loving on, the people who were "themselves" - honest- what they were doing may have been "ugly", "sinful", they may have been "diseased", or an average or below average joe...but the ones his heart seemed to be drawn to were the ones who were who they were... (like Popeye- you know, "I am what I am")

Now, on the other hand, you had the religious leaders - the "churchy people", if you will. They appeared holy- sometimes "Holier than Thou" and Jesus really seemed to have little tolerance for them. Why?
I think it is because God is much more concerned with what is in our hearts, than what we look like on the outside. If all we are really concerned about is looking good- seeming to follow all the rules (which by the way NONE of us is completely capable of doing), and having our acts together all the time....then we aren't being who we are. Who we are is flawed...imperfect...unholy...

And, if we are acting like we are perfect, we are in effect making those around us feel like we are unapproachable in many ways...Most people won't really be themselves and open up around a person they only see "being good" or "perfect" all the time. They are afraid of being judged against that kind of person because of their imperfections. Jesus was (is) approachable. He wants us all to come AS WE ARE ....not as they wish they were....with imperfections, unholiness, and flaws...

The video below is another way this question was brought to my attention a couple of days ago...

                                                       http://vimeo.com/17269581
And check out my cousin's blog- kind of on the same subject about a week or so ago...

                                           http://tdubble.blogspot.com/2010/11/effin-changed.html

Letting Go...Nothing but net!

It is crazy! Lately, I feel like I am learning to "let go" again and again....and I guess I have to admit, it is kinda freeing to let go...so much more relaxing than trying to pull back, and hold on, and redirect. It is refreshing, I guess. There are just so many things in life I really have no control at all over and I am learning that this is absolutley OK.

The most recent thing has been my oldest daughter. I love her with all my heart. She is amazing and wonderful and I completely trust her. But, at some point I wasn't lining those feelings up with action. She is a great basketball player- she "gets" the game. She has basketball I.Q. and she shoots about 50% these days from the 3 point line. She can rebound like crazy..she has some good defense and some great post moves!

I was on her, though. Not in front of everyone else...but I was constantly asking her what she was working on- trying to get her to do more- sort of pushing her. I wasn't the only one who was doing this...but, I will take responsibility for my part for sure!

I had been coaching her since she was in kindergarten and it was hard to realize that perhaps we were entering a phase of her life when basketball wasn't about "us"- but about "her". This game has reached a stage in High School level, where it has become her game. She was getting frustrated by all the extra involvement from home...she wasn't loving it anymore or having much fun for that matter.

I heard her loud and clear when she said she didn't, and then added that she didn't want to play Travel Ball anymore...OUCH! That was hard to hear. For years she had been - we had been- talking about her getting a scholarship, playing in college, trying for WNBA...and coaching. Now, suddenly within a matter of seconds, none of that was in the picture...

So, I backed down. I said, "You know, I am proud of you for having the courage to say what is on your mind and I am excited what will come as a result of your decision." I stepped back. I would drive her to a lesson, (she has a great opportunity for private lessons with a coach who was All American and played for UCONN), to and from practice, do what she needed- but what she needed would no longer be determined by me- but by her!

It has been amazing to see her take off with this. She is making decisions and practicing on her own. She is asking me to make sure we schedule those private lessons. She is now not only playing, but starting on Varsity as a freshman and she is having fun again! She has gotten her edge back, too. She has stepped up and said, "There are upper classmen who want my spot- I have to work hard to keep it." and "I am a freshman starting Varsity- I need to be a leader!"

I would not have the pleasure of witnessing her grow had I not let go!! On top of that- I get to enjoy being her supportive parent- with no other motive than just watching my baby do what she loves and have fun doing it! In the game of life that feeling could be labeled as "Nothing but net!" :)

Parallel Worlds Intersect!

As I write this I am smiling from the inside out! I think it is absolutely cool and amazing how life works and it is with much enthusiam and anticipation that I think about all the possibilities of the future right now!

What has happened is this: about a month ago one of my best friends in the world from Canton, Ohio texted me on a Sunday morning. She told me that they had some friends that we would love who were moving from Canton to Colorado! She wanted me to "friend" the mom of the family on Facebook. So, of course I did just that! (This is the second time one of my best friends told me about a new friend I needed to meet in a new area we had just moved to- the last one turned into another best friend- what did I have to lose?)

So, I "friended" this lady and came to find out that her husband was coming before her and their FOUR DAUGHTERS....Yes! That's right- 4 girls...all between the ages of 13-8 (we have four daughters between the ages of 15-10 and Mark came out here before us) Coincidence?? I think not!

In our emailing on FB, I discovered that she was very emotional about all of this- leaving family, friends, being a temporary single parent to four daughters with a busy life, the oldest daughter was quite down on the whole move, and somewhere within all of that- she knew this was for the best and would all work out.

Wow....my heart immediately became attached to this family. I felt for them, literally! After all, we had just been down such a similar road just a couple months before. I remembered Mark talking about how lonely it was to stay in a hotel for 4 months- how much he missed me and the kids and the busyness of our lives together. I felt not only for this Momma that I could relate to, for the oldest daughter- who reminded me of my oldest, but also for this Dad that was beginning to remind me of my husband.

Well, as anyone who knows me knows...I wanted to extend a helping hand...to try to help in some way...it was on my heart to offer the Dad to move in with our crazy family until he could find a home and get his family out here with him. I aksed Mark-- which many people know is the logical one of us, and will often pull me back down to the ground when my heart starts fluttering with emotion all over the place...I was wondering...what will he say? Will it be "No, not now..." I mean, we do already have an exchange student here. He has said "not now" about adopting, about bringing an 18 year old homeless boy into our home...I wasn't sure....

HE SAID, "YES!!" And it gets more amazing!! In fact, when we lived in Canton, we lived only a block away from this family. Our kids took dance lessons at the same dance studio and in fact in some of the same classes! We were friends with some of the same people and never met! Never even remember seeing eachother!!

It was as if we lived in parallel worlds-- until a time such as this! We both took a turn- a little change in direction- to a new place and now our paths have crossed!! And, it is amazing! One might look at the situation and think that it seems like we are being "helpful", "caring", "sweet" or "generous". The fact of the matter is that we are doing just what we felt led to do. In return, we are feeling tremendously blessed - it is like having family here so far away....I really cannot wait to see how our family and this family develop relationally as our paths have intersected at a time when both of us have left so much behind and ventured out here! I cannot wait to see all that is in store for us as families and as friends. (I will keep you posted!) ;)

Exciting, right??!!

Kicking and Screaming...Silly Me!

Lately, I cannot help but think about how torn up I was about this move to Colorado just a few short months ago. Some people may remember...I was tallying up how many miles this place was going to be from all of my loved ones, I was upset about just starting to "find myself" again and my love of exercise and feeling like I would have to give up and start over. I was feeling bad for my children and the fact that they were so sad to leave friends and family so far behind...I was sad about leaving my travel basketball team. I was just a big blob of emotions- dealing with being the only parent around for 4 girls for 4 months, and feeling all of my emotions, their emotions...it was all so difficult for me at the time.

The funny thing is, that I look at that now and I see my girls still keeping in touch with their friends, but making many new friends. I see them - and all of us- and how we have grown closer as a family again. We have found a fantastic church - and all of us have found friends there that are so caring and wonderful. Each person is also getting involved in life here and enjoying it!

I see Tanise diving into school- both, socially and scholastically, and trying new things and succeeding! Shyanna is in two different youth groups- one at church, and one through Young Life. She is enjoying basketball again at school and making some good friendships! I see Nikayta and Cadence both enjoying basketball and are excelling in gymnastics- making friends and enjoying being the last two still home with me doing school.

Mark is enjoying his job emmensely and is doing a fantastic job at it! (No one ever had doubts about that!) He is enjoying our church and family time...and starting to coach rec-league basketball where it is fun to hear him plan and enjoy developing skills of kids who may have never played before!

Then there is me....silly me....I feel like such a GOOF!! It brings tears to my eyes when I think of how well my whole family is doing and then I am so humbled by how well things are going for me, too. Me, the one who was feeling like I was "giving up" so much and on the inside - kicking and screaming the whole way. I LOVE the friends I am making. People I can tell, who are going to be like family to us here. I LOVE our church and how it emphasizes family and has such focus on partnering with parents to help their kids stay on the right path! I have found a place to get my hands dirty and help people in our community who are going through trying times through this church and also have been blessed with the opportunity to get up and act out life lessons for our family worship service- (how I LOVE the arts!) :)

And, as if all of that were not enough, I have already been asked to teach three Zumba classes a week starting in January! Two at a recreation center, and one for kids at a dance studio! As if that weren't enough, I actually just got a call from a Curves that wants me to teach Zumba in the Circuit there!! (They called me! - Unbelieveable!)

I am not coaching basketball right now...and I love coaching...but I am still going to have the opportunity to interact and maybe help occasionally...I miss my loved ones....but I FEEL SO BLESSED! I AM so blessed!

Never in my wildest imagination would I have thought such tremendous blessing awaited us here!! I am in awe...I am humbled, very, very thankful -and I am amazed!!

Lastly, did I mention the mountains and how you can see them from EVERYWHERE?? They are a blessing in and of themselves! I guess - as it is the case in many things and at many times- you never really know how things will be until you get there! If you never take the risk, you may never have the adventure or find the blessing!

Silly Me!!

"Your Name is on the Guest List!"

Today I was reminded of some friends I have that say they cannot go into a church.... They say lightning would strike, the walls would fall - you get the idea...and if you are reading this, you know who you are....

The thing is, that is the FURTHEST thing from the truth!

For one thing, everyone in church is IMPERFECT! Everyone in church has problems, issues, concerns, questions, struggles, imperfections, and sin...

For another thing, the Bible CLEARLY tells us that Jesus came for people with problems, issues, concerns, questions, struggles, imperfections and sin.... there would be NO REASON for Him...if we WERE perfect!

My point is this, Jesus is an INCLUDER - not an EXCLUDER! He wants YOU!!! YOUR NAME IS ON HIS GUEST LIST!!!!

Pruning

We recently did some yard work in preparation for winter.

It always gives me a sort of weird feeling as I cut bushes back and we remove branches from trees...

I guess it leaves me feeling a little sad. I mean, they look so beautiful and then we leave them looking half-dressed...weak...puny...almost damaged sometimes....

Then I focus on picturing them after winter ends. I picture them with tiny green leaves and blossoms and looking full and beautiful again! Ahhh! That's better!! The reality is that without the pruning we do, they would not grow as well- as full. Sure they would grow- but more slowly and sporadically.

The same thing happens to us in our lives. We grow, we get pruned, we recover- or rest, and we grow- more fully- becoming more beautiful!

If you are reading this and you are going through difficulties right now...remember that it is a season...you may feel and even look weak, tired, puny and damaged...but this time in your life will work to add to your beauty in the next season!

Did You Know?

Did you know there once was a king who gave up his crown to live a life as an "illigitimate" child growning up in a home with his mother, half-brothers and half-sisters, and a step-dad.

As he grew, he chose to leave the comforts of a home and he became a homeless person, traveling around  serving, and helping people he met along the way.

A lot of the people he chose to hang out with were people that most of society ridiculed, looked down on, or considered dirty..even hated.

Did you know that this person, really lived and there is documentation about him?

Did you know this is a person I look up to very much...and I hope that my life will even remotely resemble his by the time it is all said and done....?

Diverse City

Hmmm....one thing I love about people is their differences! Yeah, exactly....what makes people uinque and different from others is what really gets me intereseted in a person. I like to meet someone who has a little flare in their style. A person who may say some words I am not used to hearing. A person who kinda stands out in a crowd - is the person I am drawn to.
Perhaps it is because, unwillingly, I was made aware of differences at a very young age. I had moved about 10 times by the time I was 11. I had a very unusual name..."Callico Sunshine Jones" , hair that looked very similar in color and shine to a brand new copper penny, and lots of freckles, was usually one of the taller people in my class and...oh yeah- did I mention I had glasses? I guess you could say I stood out in a crowd...and I remember not really liking that fact!
I had a best friend in High School whose mom was white and dad was black. This was more unusual when I was younger than it is now. We went to a predominently "white" school. I thought she was just the prettiest and coolest girl in the world. (She was VERY beautiful, was very athletic, smart, and compassionate- she was one of those people who will walk in and stand by someone when everyone else walks out.) I enjoyed learning how we were different- but loved the fact that our differences didn't matter- they made each of us individuals and therefore special. We were also very much alike in many ways...oh....she will always be so dear to my heart!
One of my favorite songs as a child was a song that talked about a little boy who went to school and the teacher wanted them to draw and color a picture. He painted his with many colors. He thought it was beautiful! Then the teacher told him that it was wrong. "Green grass is green, blue skys are blue." The little boy said, "There are so many colors in the rainbow, so many colors in the morning sun, so many colors in the flowers, and I see every one!" He ended up learning from her to paint in the way she wanted-- forgetting about all the colors and beauty he once saw! That song  WOULD MAKE ME CRY as a little girl.
I was watching a kid at The Ohio State University walk down the road listening to his walkman (I am dating myself!) as I sat in my car at a light on the way to class. He was JAMMING! I was staring at him thinking, "How cool is it that he is singing at the top of his lungs, dancing spastically all over the place, and doesn't care about the line up of cars with people in them at this light he is right beside!" Then, he got really close to my car and flipped me off...and I realized I was staring and he had no idea that as I stared I had thoughts of how impressed and almost proud I was of him....
Living in Colorado now, I ADORE Boulder!! Why? I love the artsy feeling that surrounds me when I am there. I also LOVE the people I see there. Individuals everywhere! It is sooooo cool to me!! The beauty of God's creation everywhere- including people who get that they are individuals and do not have to conform. It is like a breath of fresh air to me!!
I have learned of two little girls in my life over the past year who have a mom of one race, and a dad of another. The little girls have people that point them out as different. They may even get labled in some ways. It saddens them and their parents because they grew up to a certain point not realizing they were at all different from anyone else around them. Suddenly, that is changing. I remember what it felt like to have those differences pointed out to me..."freckle face", "four eyes", "skinny minny", "toothpick", "carrot top"...have kids sing songs making fun of my name...It made me feel like the odd ball out...a strange creature...weird! I didn't like it. I wanted to be just like everyone else.
What happened to the song I used to love?? The beauty and freedom of seeing, accepting, and loving the beauty of difference and color and uniqueness?? I was trying to conform. Blech!
I am fortunate, as an adult, I have been able to recapture that awe for life and love of unique and I feel that I have passed that on to my children. It is the very thing, at times, that makes people different, that also makes them unique and beautiful!
How boring would the world be if everyone was the same. Looked the same, acted the same, sounded the same....How boring would it be if truly all grass looked green and the entire sky was always the same shade of blue?

A Mother's Prayer

Heavenly Father,
I pray for my daughter right now.
I pray beginning with her head, Lord, that You would help her to take her thoughts captive. That she would focus on good, noble, and beautiful things, Father.I pray her concerns would rest on doing what pleases You. I pray that she not be distracted or easily swayed.
I ask that her eyes be protected- not to see things that would put bad impressions in her mind- and that they would also be open to see things and people the way You do.
I pray that her ears hear Your truth and that she believe, but that she is able to block out untruth and harmful sounds. I pray for her mouth, that You would use it to bless others, to encourage and to uplift, to sing words that praise You and let others know who You are and how You have blessed her.
I pray, Father, that you guard her heart. Please help her to be loving, but to be wise with the emotion and love that she gives away. I pray that she would love You more than anyone or anything in this world and that she would seek You in all things with all of her mind and heart.
I pray, God, that she would trust You - know that You have her best interest at heart and plans for her life for good and not harm. I pray, Lord, that her heart would break over the things that break Your heart- that she would have compassion and mercy. I also pray that her heart would be filled with joy over the things that bring You joy.
Heavenly Father, I ask that her hands would be used to serve others and care for Your people and to care for those others might consider less than worthy. I pray that she would see the value and worth in every life- as You do.
I pray that she would be prayerful always...bringing all of her life and all of her dreams, goals and desires before You. I pray that she would also bring others to You in prayer on a regular basis and would realize that battles we fight are not battles of the flesh...but spiritual, and that she must rely on You.
I pray that she would keep nutritional and healthy things going into her body and take care of herself  physically.
I pray, God, that she would hunger for You. I pray that she would know that she is a priceless and precious creation - made from Your hand- and that her body is Your Temple and needs to be cared for accordingly.
I pray that where her feet would go would be on the path that You have cleared and gone before her. I pray she would follow You always and be able to rest in the shadow of Your love and protection. I pray against her being distracted and led down dangerous paths.
I pray for the people in her life- that she would be a leader to others and that she would also be able to accept wise counsel. I pray that she would be surrounded by those that love and cherrish her.
 I pray You would put people in her life that keep her accountable and help her along life's journey who also love You and that these relationships would be like iron sharpening iron.
I pray for her spouse - I pray that if it is in Your plan for her to marry, that You would help each of them remain pure and have less baggage to bring into their relationship.
 I pray that You would let them be like-minded in their beliefs in raising children, following You, dealing with finances, and serving others. I pray You would already be protecting him and helping Him to follow You and love You above all else. I pray You would guide that relationship and anything and everything it entails.
God, I also pray that You would start with me. Help me to be the mother You know she needs. Help me to be a good example to her of a woman, a wife, a friend, a sister, a mother, and Your daughter. Give me the right words to say when she needs to hear them. Help me to support her and encourage her and love her the way you know she needs. Help me to be a warrior on her behalf. To fight against the evils of this world that would try to knock her down and destroy her.
She has changed my life and I love her. I trust You with her and thank you for her life and the blessing she is to so many. I praise You, because she is fearfully and wonderfully made!
In Jesus' name I pray.
Amen

Intentional...

Intentional...Intentional....Intentional.

That has been the buzz word as of late for me! It keeps buzzing into my ears and then it lingers in my heart after I hear it!

So, what does it mean??: conscious, deliberate, intended, knowing, purposeful, purposive, set, voluntary, willed, willful (or wilful), witting....

The context in which this word keeps coming up is RELATIONALLY.

So, what does it look like to be INTENTIONAL in RELATIONSHIPS??

Well, let me say that in the beginning of most relationships we have- we try to reach out to the other person. We call, write, see them as often as we can, perhaps we do things for them that we know they will like, we say sweet and encouraging things to them...basically, we do and say what we can when a relationship is new to let the other person know we care about them and the relationship we have with them.

Sooner or later, we reach a point in most relationships, however, where we kinda sorta don't keep doing all of that. I am not sure if we just get to a place where we feel like the other person should know we care by now, or we just don't realize that we are no longer placing as much energy there because we have started placing our energy in other places.

I am convinced that LOVE is what makes the world go round. I am a big fan of LOVE! I wear lots of "heart jewelry" and even have a "heart tattoo". I value relationships above all else! People are important to me and it is important that people I know - know they are valued and important to me.

Hmmmm....what I have realized lately, though, is that I am not always as intentional as I could or should be in making sure people know I care. I am usually not as intentional about it as I was when the relationship first began.

I am working on that now... No matter how long I have been in a relationship with a person, it is imperative that they KNOW they are still as important today as they were the day our relationship began! Heck, they are MORE important today!!!!

In the day-to-day living I do I am going to be sure I pray for them. I am going to be more intentional about keeping in touch. (With all the technology we have today that shouldn't be so hard!) Phone calls, emails, writing on their facebook wall, a text...make a "Skype Date", hopefully, setting up travel dates!

The people that are physically closer to me...I am going to turn the distrations off- the music, the TV...so we can TALK. Make plans with them to do things together...go back to the basics...SHOW them INTENTIONALLY that they matter as I use words of encouragement, serve them when I can, spend time with them, hug them- pat them on the back, and as I can, give them little gifts.

Love is action...showing someone that I love them means I must DO something. I cannot just assume they know I care. I must be INTENTIONAL!


So, let me start here...if you are one of the people I have not been being intentional with about letting you know you matter to me, you DO matter! And starting now, let me try to reach out and remind you of how special you are!! :)

Incredibly Thankful!

Sometimes, I take life for granted!
Sometimes, I forget to really look at all the many wonderful things I have been blessed with.
Sometimes, I am given an opportunity to slow down and I have a chance to really reflect- and those are moments that cause me to stand in awe....

In the everyday living...homeschooling, taxi-driving, cooking, cleaning, helping with homework, cheering on my kids and husband, playing nurse, counselor, caring for our animals, helping others, working out and ...well, you get it...everyday living...I sometimes lose sight of how I am blessed!

This weekend, I was able to spend time with my 12 year old daughter. As we spent time together, she looked at me with a big smile on her face and said, "Mommy, you really have taught us a lot!" I said, "I have?" (We went on a little mini-retreat together to talk about life- changes that were coming her way and whatever she might have had questions about along the way...more teaching moments, I suppose...and some very cool memory making- with 4 kids within 5 years of eachother, it isn't often I get to have such a big chunk of time with just one!)

She went on to say, "Yes! You taught us to read, and tie shoes, and walk, and write, and roller skate and swim, and do math ...about God, how to treat people- you have taught us a LOT!"

In that moment, and with those words from my young daughter, I supppose I felt more blessed than I ever thought possible!! I am sooooooo thankful that I have been able to be with my daughters so much - to be able to spend so much time with them and to be so influential in their lives in day-to-day living!

What an honor and a privledge to be able to have children...and then to be able to be such a big part of their learning and their lives! I am incredibly THANKFUL!

Helpless but not Hopeless

People who know me- even those who don't know me well...usually know that I am active. I am not one to just sit around relaxing for the most part. Those who know me also know that if someone I love has a problem, I do whatever I can to help. If you are sick, I can make soup. You have dirty floors? I can clean them. You need a schedule to help you get things done; I will make one with you. You need help with your kids- count on me. You need to talk; I will listen. Ask for prayer- I'm on it! You get what I am saying, I am sure. I love to serve. I love to help. On the other hand....I hate feeling helpless....like there is nothing I can "do".

I have this thing called "Mercy" at the top of my list when it comes to Spiritual Gifts . "Acts of Service" and "Quality Time" are how I show love and feel loved, if you are studying The Five Love Languages. And if you are familiar with Living Your Strengths , my top five are Achiever, Maximizer, Relator, Strategic and Responsibility. If you understand any of this, you understand that I am very much a "do-er" and that urge to DO is fueled BIG TIME when I feel compassion about a situation or person(s).

I tell you ALL of that to say this...Since we moved to Colorado, I am perhaps further away  from some of the people I love than I have ever been in my life. I am experiencing something very new to me because of this. I FEEL HELPLESS! I can easily count on all my fingers and toes people I am far away from right now that my heart is longing to help. To hug, to see, to be there and do whatever they need as often as I can to help them in some way as they go through some very difficult things right now.

It actually makes me cry as I think about them and the circumstances they are in. What they are going thru. With tears in my eyes, I realize that the best thing...really the only thing I can do is pray. I have always prayed for people. I always will. But this is new to me. I am used to being able to pray and do something. I can do nothing BUT pray now....

I was in the same situation of feeling helpless when we moved here and I watched one of my children struggle with this move they did not wish to make. Though I tried to do what I could to help them adjust and feel good in the new situation they were in, I really couldn't do anything but pray. Sometimes I cried myself to sleep. Or just cried as I listened to her or thought about her.

This feeling of being helpless is difficult for me.

It reminds me though, that God wants us to be like little children when we come before Him...and one thing all little children are is helpless. We come into this world so dependent on others. I guess just as a child depends on adults for protection, food, shelter, comfort, etc., we are dependent on God. I am dependent on God. It is really HIM that takes care of those I love. Even when I DO what I can to serve them and help them...it is HIM working through me to help them...and no doubt as I sit here and pray for, think about, cry over people I love and their situations...HE is HELPING them. Maybe this time around He is just working through other people to DO...and I am sitting here learning again that it isn't always about what we are physically doing...maybe I am learning to have more faith and more trust, like a child trusts and relies on their parent when they are helpless...

I may feel Helpless, but I am not Hopeless!

Temptation

                                                             


Well, this can be a touchy subject....people don't often want to admit they have temptations...

A temptation is an act that looks appealing to an individual. It is usually used to describe acts with negative connotations and as such, tends to lead a person to regret such actions, for various reasons: legal, social, psychological (including feeling guilt), health, economic, etc. (wikipedia)

I have been faced with temptations in my life again and again....sometimes on a daily basis! Some of them have been easy to turn away from. Others, have been quite difficult.

Just recently one of my biggest temptations...and hardest to overcome...has gotten a little easier. I stuggle with Pepsi! I love the carbonation...the sweetness...the coolness....Ahhhhhh! Wow!....And if it is from a fountain- THAT'S the BEST!

For the past year, I allowed myself to have it once a day, after cutting back from having a couple or more a day. When I began doing P90X, Tony kinda sorta said it was a good thing to cut it out. And, I knew deep inside, he was right!! (That's the same with most temptations....they make you feel like they are beneficial...almost good for you in some way...and in reality it is just emptiness...and often bad for you.) It really is nothing but empty calories and loads of sugar I don't need and caffiene that I already get from other sources... (another addiction?) So, as addicted as I had been, I stopped having it daily and allowed myself to have a little on the weekend... :)

What I have found with Pepsi as with other temptaions I have had in my life is that those temptaions which are not good for me fade...they are somehow removed....sometimes slowly but surely and sometimes altogether and rapidly!

This Pepsi Addiction has been kind of a slowly fading one...and suddenly I tried to drink it today for a treat- and YUCK! It really made me feel kinda sick!  What in the world??!! I don't think I will be tempted by that one for a while!! :) I hope not anyway.....

Learning thru Yoga

                                                                           


I have been doing P90X for about 20 days. It is great work out program! The beauty of it is that it brings variety and challenge to the work out.  Day one- Back, Chest and Abs. Day two- Plyometrix. Day three- Shoulders, Arms and Abs. Day four- Yoga. Day five- Back, Legs and Abs. Day six- Kenpo. Day seven- Stetch/Rest.

This program is good for me as it calls for balance...a little bit of everything. Anyone who knows me at all, knows I can really dive into things- especially if I enjoy them! I enjoy exercise and if this program didn't challenge me to be "EXTREME" and push myself to shaking burn out on the weights end, I would probably double up and maybe even triple up! I cannot, though as my muscles are shaking and done by the end of my reps...

I struggle the most, I think with Yoga! I enjoy it, don't get me wrong. I love the challenge of holding a position, focussing on relaxing unused muscle groups, breathing steadily, and then having muscle groups I am using shake as I hold a position for as long as I can. I feel challenged and fatigued and stetched...and by the end of the hour and a half session, I am feeling like I am so at peace that I could fall asleep in corpse pose, or child's pose!

The BALANCE portion of it, however, is my biggest challenge. I actually laugh at myself sometimes as I stuggle to find balance in some of the poses and sometimes as I fall out of a pose, I laugh out loud. It got me thinking the other day as this was happening...."Isn't it ironic that THIS is the same area I struggle with most in my life? BALANCE..." I have to restrain myself and try to find balance in all areas....I could easily over eat! I love food! I could easily become so busy that I have no time to rest. I could easily allow exercising to take too much of my time. I could easliy spend hours on the computer researching. I could easily demand the house be spotless all the time. I could easily volunteer to help other people so much that I leave no time to take care of myself. Balance is what I need to work on in Yoga and in life.

I am thankful that for people who know me well enough to know they can ask me if I am keeping it all in check. I am thankful that I am gentley reminded how important it is to not become too extreme in any one direction that other important areas are neglected. Breathe---- balance....focus.

                                                                         

Untitled

                                                                        

I was sitting in church after a pretty moving morning in Rush Hour yesterday. We broke into "family groups" and my family group consisted me and my husband, our own children, and children from 2 other families. I just LOVE kids of all ages, so I was really feeling blessed to have a chance to talk with the kids, teens and tweens about how they are gifted and talented. Rush Hour also has singing, dancing and really cool skits that make you laugh as you learn..(it really has become one of the highlights of my week, since we started going a few weeks ago!) I came into "Big Church" feeling good!

The pastor came out on stage with a mega phone, and some big sign hanging around his neck that said something about "YOU ARE GOING TO BURN IN HELL!" He was shouting out words of condemnation we have all heard before...things about drinking, lust, dressing immodestly...I knew he was trying to make a point...I knew this wasn't his style...I have seen this style though, before.

He took off that "costume" and he ended up saying something that immediately brought tears to my eyes... "The reason people don't believe God loves them is because Chirstians don't love them." In fact, that makes tears come to my eyes every time I think about it!! 

THAT is TRUTH- cut right to the heart!! Jesus himself came for the poor, prisoners, blind, oppressed, lost...he had COMPASSION....he showed LOVE. He came to PROCLAIM FAVOR. To save the world...not to condemn!

I don't know why sometimes as Christians, we act like we are perfect? Christians are certainly no more perfect than anyone else in the world! The main thing is that a Christian knows they are NOT perfect and therefor, they know they need a saviour...I know that I mess up EVERY day! I am SOOO not perfect! SOOO IMPERFECT!Why wouldn't I, a Christian, want to extend and share that same mercy and grace shown to me-to the people around me on a daily basis?

It breaks my heart to here the words "The reason people don't believe God loves them is because Christians don't love them." Because, I have felt that way. I have felt that condemnation from Christians that made me feel unworthy, unloveable, unaccepted. I have had people in my family and some friends go through that as well. It really does push people away from Christianity....from Christians....from God.

I cannot speak for any other Christian. But I pray that no one I come in contact with would ever feel that from me. I pray that the people that surround me would feel LOVE. That they would KNOW I am just as human as they are and struggle just as they do...

"Since when are Christians better than anyone else?" he said. The truth is...we aren't. We just know we need the Grace and Mercy and Love that comes from God through Jesus.

Hmmmmm....just can't get it out of my head..."The reason people don't believe God loves them is because Christians don't love them."......

Take Time to Celebrate!

Last night I was able to watch The Ohio State Buckeyes play Marshall over dinner with my husband and some of his work colleagues.

It was a great game for Ohio State, and as I watched the game, I was reminded of something.

Each time a touchdown was scored, there was a little bit of time spent celebrating!

Seeing the little dances, the chest bumps, the finger pointing out to the crowd as the player came into the end zone- all little acts of celebration- that seemed to make me smile even more than the actual touchdown!

I thought to myself, "THAT'S IT! We have to take time to celebrate!"

Too often, I think we stay so focussed and so set on our "to do"  or "honey do" list that we forget how important it is to take even just a few mintues to celebrate the job well done, the process of our lives, the monuments both big and small that occur throughout the "game" of our lives.

A tooth came out, a new thing learned, a task completed, an anniversary, a birthday, a wedding, a birth, a problem solved, a step in the right direction taken, a new song learned, a new relationship, a broken relationship mended....

How about just celebrating the process? Each touchdown was a step closer to the end result of a won game. Each day we live is a step closer to the end result of our lives. Along the way, there is soooo much to dance, sing, and shout about! I don't think we should wait til the very end to reflect on that! I think we should try to reflect on the steps along the way- and take joy in them daily!

TAKE TIME TO CELEBRATE!

Bloom Where You're Planted

Where you are planted....                                    

Well, right now we are planted in Colorado. All of us. Mark, me, Valentina, Shyanna, Tanise, Nikayta and Cadence.

We have had some emotional  happenings as of late because of this fact.

Valentina arrived from Brazil on August 7th. Almost 3 weeks ago. She is a doll. We love her to pieces! It was her choice to come to the USA as an exchange student.

Sometimes choosing to be planted someplace doesn't make adjusting to the new soil any easier. She was shedding a lot of tears the first week of her stay. She was talking to and skyping with her friends and family a lot, too. She was very homesick.

Enter Shyanna. She had done so well in Romeoville her first year in public school. She had made many friends- some very dear, in fact. She also exploded on their basketball team. I guess you could say she found her niche and was loving her life. So much so, that she said she did not even want to move back to our home state of Ohio!

Transplated, not by choice, she has also been homesick. Not for her family as much (since we are here with her), but for her friends, her basketball teams, her familiar and comfy environment, the things she was looking forward to there.

We had to make some tough decisions with our girls. We had to limit time Val spent with family and friends in Brazil on the computer and phone. We may have to limit possible trips back to Illinois for Shyanna. We sometimes have to limit contact with the past so we can concentrate on the here and now. So we can grow roots and begin to bloom where we are.

A seed that keeps trying to come up out of the ground where it is planted cannot grow roots and flourish. And so it is with us. We cannot deny the place we are planted to become our home and begin to establish friends, hobbies and a life. If we are to deny these things, we are to deny all the beautiful possibilities that are before us for growing and blooming and becoming who we are supposed to be there.

Though we miss people and we have memories and plans that have not yet been fulfilled in places we have been, we cannot dwell there....where we HAVE BEEN. For by not digging into the soil that is currently around and soaking up all that it offers, a seed will never grow and a blossom can never bloom.

We must learn to BLOOM WHERE WE ARE PLANTED.

Green Pastures and Still Waters

All of my life, I have bee an achiever. Some might say an over-achiever. (lol) At times, it seems that the word "rest" could not possibly have been a word in my vocabulary! I have always enjoyed making lists and checking things off. The bigger the project, the better! People around me would just assume let me work alone as I rarely know how to even take a break! My philosphy has been that of "get the work done and then we can eat or play." 

Lately, though, all the busyness that I am accustomed to has been stripped away. There are no complications...fewer responsibilities...and beautiful green pastures, sunrises and sunsets, wildlife, and mountains everywhere I look! In fact, I have had a fox walk before my path and even a snake slither before my feet while walking around a reservoir and enjoying a gorgeous sunset this past week.

I feel rested. I used to get "heart palpitations" on occasion from nerves being jumpy- probably from being "maxed out" from all the many activities I was involved in and the many responsibilities that I held. Now, I look around me and notice a steady rhythm in my breathing and heart beating. I do not feel the stress that I once was so used to feeling and it seems to be making a difference in my ability to truly enjoy the many blessings in my life.

I can actually hear animals around me...crickets, locusts, and birds. People I care about talk to me and I am completely focussed on what they are saying and can enjoy hearing and seeing them as they share their lives with me! My husband and I have been able to spend good quality time together every day and share our lives, thoughts and feelings. I no longer have to go for a run to clear my head and think. I have a clear head...I am not distracted.

Worshipping God has never been easier! I see Him in everything surrounding me! His creation is magnificent and I am constantly marveled by it and by his many provisions for my family.

"He maketh me to lie down in green pastures. He leadeth me beside still waters."... verses I always thought talked about death. Now, I am realizing for the first time in my life that this is the key to LIFE! God doesn't want any of us so busy or so stressed that we are unable to enjoy the many blessings He has put before us! He leads us and makes us so that we can enjoy Him and all of His creation. The people, the places, the animals and the scenery! GOD IS SO GOOD!

All About Me

WOW! Today I am hit pretty hard.
Today I heard this still small voice that said- "Callico, why is everything about you?"

On my way home from taking the teens school shopping and doing our grocery shopping we managed to get into a traffic jam. A traffic jam out in the country, not during rush hour and about half an hour from home.

I sat there and enjoyed listening and watching the girls dance and sing to a couple songs on the radio...and then I began to get impatient!

I had two daughters waiting for us at home. I had a supervisor coming over to take pictures of our home for the exchange student program. I had to get home to clean up some things before that happened. I had frozen veggies in the back of the van that were thawing. I had to PEE!

Did you hear me?? I HAD! I. I. I. I. I. I. I. ......

UGH! Then it happened, we came across the hold up. There were skid marks all across the road from what looked like the other side of the median and when you followed them to where they ended, you saw a car- a car that had completely flipped and there were things lying on the ground around it. It made me want to PUKE that I had been so concerned about ME!

Started thinking, then. That still small voice was RIGHT ON! (Unfortunately) For the past year, I am realizing how self-centered and self-seeking I have been. I HAVE made it all about me. Virtually everything! I used to be selfless and so other-motivated. What happened???

I went from being a stay-at-home mom who wrapped her world around her husband and children, to this lady who seemed to never have enough. Not given enough credit, clothes, purses, time to herself, or jewelry for that matter. I went from being so involved at church- singing, praying with people, leading small group and doing Children's Ministry- to not being involved at all. Who had I been serving for the past year? Who had I been concerned about?? Me. That's who!

I got the message today. I am not feeling good about it at all. But, I guess it is better to hear it and be able to work at getting back to the basics of caring more about others....less about me, than to have not heard it.

I realize I will need a balance. It is never good to go to the complete extreme on either level, I am realizing. I will need to take care of myself so I can care for others. But, right now, I guess I am still digesting this rough message....

Second Chances

This is my second attempt at writing this blog and how fitting to be writing about second chances! This just keeps in what appears to be the theme of my week- first week in our new home in Colorado!

It all started last week when a pregnant lady was going door-to-door in our neighborhood selling magazines to put herself through Nursing College. She asked if we believed in second chances. Immediately I said, "Yes!" She gave me a high five and asked me why, to which I replied, "Because I have been given second chances." She shared that she felt she was being given a second chance through this selling opportunity as she was from the Inner City and had a baby on the way and was preparing for a better life for the two of them. I appreciated her story.

This past Sunday, my daughter shared with me that her pastor in Sunday school let each child in her class take one shot at a basket. That was all they got- one chance. After, the pastor asked if they would rather have had the opportunity for more than one shot- or chance and he proceeded with a lesson on second chances.

Later that day, our exchange student shared with us that she had been hit by a bus while walking. Then, last night we were jogging together outside and I heard her wheezing. She shared that she had asthma and when she was nine it was a big problem and took her to the hospital with cardiovascular trouble. (Talk about second chances!)

Then, today as I was preparing lunch, I heard one of my other daughters talking with her siblings about second chances....I thought, WOW! Could I hear that one more time?? WHAT is going on?

I have had a pretty lazy day with lots of time to think. (I am a thinker anyway- you will rarely- if ever catch me with nothing on my mind.) I thought about this apparent "theme" and why it is that it keeps coming up. I also thought about the many second chances I have been familiar with during my life.

I thought about me walking into a room where a heavy bookcase was and seeing my little brother climbing up on it just as it began tipping forward. I ran in and was able to hold it up until my mom could come in and help.

I thought about a friend of mine choking while we were on a trip to Washington DC and how I performed the Heimlich without being trained how and the food came dislodged and flew out of her mouth and she stopped choking.

I thought about the many times I had taken my life into my own hands as a young adult thinking I was invinceable and doing very stupid things! How it was a miracle at the very least I had made it through some of those situations.

I thought about a couple of friends who tried to commit suicide that I was able to be there for and get help - and thankfully they survived!

I remembered a time I was driving my Ford Escort to BGSU during a snow storm with some friends and how my car was spinning out of control as a semi approached from the other direction on a two lane highway. I fought and fought to straighten it out, but nothing worked until I completely let go of the wheel and sent up a little prayer. Suddenly, we were driving straight and out of harm's way.

I reflected on a couple relationships I have had with people that would be completely dead right now if it weren't for second chances.

Soon I was thinking about the present. About how in some ways it already seems as though we have been given a second chance with this move. A chance to bring our family closer to our values again. A chance to strengthen our relationships with eachother, a chance to see some economic growth, a chance to be more involved at church. Could it be that somehow we will be used here to help give another person a second chance at something? The possibilities are endless!

Who knows....but I know that the possibilities are there. They are ever present. You never know how many chances you will get in this life and you never know how you may be involved in another person's second chance....

Do I believe in Second Chances??? YES!!!! And, I am VERY THANKFUL for them!

Dumpster Diving

A lot of changes are going on in my life right now. We have just relocated from Chicago, Illinois to Denver, Colorado. I have been living in a hotel with 4 girls, and two dogs for the past 4 days. We will be joined by my husband - and finally move into our new home - which by the way, I never even saw until we arrived here yesterday. I relied on my guy to find us the perfect place! (Yes, he did a fantastic job! I knew he would!)

I gave up coaching basketball. Something I have been passionate about for the past 9 or so years. I started coaching when my oldest was in Kindergarten and she is now going into 9th grade. I had recently established a couple of Zumba fitness classes at our local recreation center- and had to leave that, as well as a very fun neighborhood Zumba Fitness class and a lot of great neighbors!

Now- combine all of this with the fact that I was leaving some people I hold very dear to my heart- people I love. Add to that the fact that so were my family members and as you might know- a mother feels the pain her children feel...and I swear I felt every emotion they have had about this move right along with them.

We are also moving further from the family and friends we love in Ohio- which means less visits with them...this is yet another thing pulling at our heart strings!

On top of all of this- I have been a single parent of four girls and two dogs for 3 months. (My husband went on ahead of us to start his new job). Trying to keep all the regular things that go along with "normal life"as well as preparing for this move was definitely a challenge at times!

I am not complaining. I knew from the time we moved to our home in Illinois from our home in Canton, Ohio that we would be moving again. In fact, we thought we may only be in Chicago for a short 1 year to 18 months. With the economy taking a downward turn, we stayed for 3 yearsas Mark's company was not moving people into new positions for a while. I am simply saying all of this to say.....

At times, I have been a basket case. Crying. And crying. And crying. At times I have been a complete GRUMP. At times, I have been reclusive and wanted nothing from no one. My emotions have been all over the place and sometimes very ugly. I certainly haven't felt quite like my normal self. I have not had the patience and cheer and joy and love that I seem to normally have quite easily.

It was when I threw my keys into a dumpster along with our trash somewhere in Nebraska and on our way to Colorado that something occurred to me. The dumpster stank! The keys went right to the bottom...I could see them- but there was no way to reach them without diving in after them. It wasn't pretty!

That is when my 3rd daughter smiled and said, "Sure, I will get them..."and with a smile on her face, she went in, grabbed them and came out! I have thought about that over and over the past couple days.

It reminded me of other loved ones in my life- and how they dive right in with me - sometimes without me- when things are going bad and they stink and they smile and say "Sure!" It is through these times in life when things can get ugly- when IIIII can get ugly and IIII stink - that I most see and feel the love of those who choose to ignore the stench and be there with me and for me!

It reminds me and inspires me to be that kind of person- to have that kind of selfless love for those in my life who need that smile and willingness to dive into the stink of the dumpster!